All abuse is evil, but there does become a point where a narcissist can shift from toxic, to psychopathic.
At this point, I would say you have to leave. These 4 signs really only exist to tell you that if you aren't already on your way out of the door, you need to be.
The truth hurts, and this is a perfect example of displaying the truly disturbing signs narcissists produce when they want to twist their evil games to another extreme.
If they sound familiar, don't walk, run.
#1 They can't even hide the pleasure they get from seeing you in pain
When you initially got together, those early days may have contained moments where you got upset, maybe you cried a little.
The narcissist will have reacted coldly to that, not knowing what to do to help you, or even wanting to fully try.
There will have been this thick, untenable layer of distance between you as they looked on at you in a heap on the floor, beside yourself with pain.
In some way though, they tried to keep that performance going. They tried to make it seem like they cared.
When the abuse turns psychopathic, all bets are off.
Your tears no longer pay for their performance toward you, and instead, you get this sick smile that almost feels as though it's taunting you even more.
This makes your pain so much worse, and the narcissist doesn't even slightly care about it.
If you are displaying fears, these very things will just be laughed at.
In fact, if you were to physically look at them when you're breaking down, they actually look as though they're enjoying every part of it.
If you are reading this, I want you to read every word so carefully, because this goes far beyond anything that may constitute odd behavior.
This is really disturbing, and nobody should be caught up in a relationship where things are this evil and toxic.
It isn't even as if they're acting the worst they could act; this is an entirely different category, and one you should run, not walk away from.
If you're seeing a smile when you're suffering, it's telling you far more about who they are as a person than you will ever hear in words.
Believe it, and get out.
#2 They plan strategically how to hurt you
There are early stages of narcissistic abuse where there are certain reactions built for you to fall into.
The narcissist may take a moment a step too far and also out at you.
They snap, and you witness it all, wondering how it happened. It doesn't matter; all that matters is it did happen.
In the midst of it all, there is still this impulsive streak. You know, because afterward, the narcissist retreats and perhaps even shows a little remorse.
Enter your innocent day where this abuse has turned psychopathic.
This day started off well, but it somehow turned into a fight. The fight was curated by the narcissist without your knowledge or consent, but it drew you in, and your reaction to it meant it existed.
The difference is that you start to notice small little moves that guide you both to that fight.
You look even further, and see money being moved over a long period of time, or passwords to your joint accounts being changed so you don't know what they are.
These are moves that signal real power at play, and it's been really thought out.
This is the exact opposite of anger being expressed in a single moment, and instead points to a much more pre-meditated form of abuse.
It is cruel and calculated. There's nothing the narcissist is specifically reacting to, but boy, are they building something without you.
And they want to take it all and win.
Before they get to do that, I urge you to prepare what you can and leave because this is very psychopathic behavior.
#3 They knowingly scare you just to see your reaction
Here's where we can get to a point where you may feel quite triggered, so let's go steady.
A Narcissist assisting relationship has the ability to be physically intimidating.
I've heard your experiences, and I've read all the accounts. It can be scary to be with somebody so unpredictable and intent on hurting you.
Then we move to a more psychopathic dynamic, and we truly read troubling situations that are real for so many people.
A door that slams hard and makes you jump. A hand they raise over you, then drop before they touch you.
Maybe a shove that wasn't really a shove to them. Or what about that pressured grip on your arm to get your attention or prove a point?
It wasn't that hard. Why do you make such a fuss of nothing?
Even though they cross the line, they still manage to gaslight you.
With a psychopathic narcissist, they're looking for ways to experiment with you and always take it to the next level.
What they get out of it every single time is your fear response, so they can note what works and what doesn't with you.
Over time, it all gets so much more real. So much messier. Even more physical.
Each time you flinch is a moment you are anticipating what you know has come before.
The body knows.
The body remembers.
#4 They state what will happen to you if you decide to leave
Whether the narcissist is clear or vague, they will still want you to get whatever message they're sending you.
If you're dealing with a regular, toxic narcissist, that's bad enough. They will use manipulation to get you to stay, or make leaving them seem difficult.
A psychopathic narcissist?
They threaten.
They may not shout or even raise their voice slightly, but that doesn't mean they aren't exhibiting dangerous traits.
You know how tough it is for women to live alone these days? Sally down the road left her husband, remember? She had a bad time recovering from that.
Suddenly, you not only feel trapped, but you're treated like somebody who is trapped.
There's no pretence here. You aren't imagining the worry you feel when you sense the abuse you've experienced takes an even darker turn.
#5 So, what do you do?
If you're going through any of these four signs, now isn't the moment you decide to reflect.
Now is the time to plan.
Talk to somebody you know and trust who is outside the house.
Anybody who can help make your life easier or get you to a safe place. Grab those important documents before the narcissist does.
Trust that intuitive part of you that knew this was where the relationship was headed.
You've noticed for a long time how things are getting worse, and rather than sit on it and accept it, you are now ready to move…
…Move without them.
And never let it be said that you are overreacting. There's no way you can suffer from these treatments and think, "Well, it isn't that bad."
I assure you, it is.
